


Interviewing Your Local, Loveable Cryptids

by ranguvar82



Series: Silence and Strength [30]
Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Aziraphale is "just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing" (Good Omens), Gen, POV Outsider, South Downs Cottage (Good Omens), crowley and aziraphale know that the villagers know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:08:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23380684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ranguvar82/pseuds/ranguvar82
Summary: 'Stupid school giving stupid assignments', Denise thought. An interview. She had to do an interview. But who was cool enough? Then it hit her. Ezra and Tony. They were pretty neat, right? And maybe, just maybe, she could clarify a few...bets.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Series: Silence and Strength [30]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1630903
Comments: 8
Kudos: 204





	Interviewing Your Local, Loveable Cryptids

Interviewing Your Local, Lovable Cryptids

Denise groaned in annoyance as she walked into the kitchen, tossing her backpack onto the counter. “Stupid assignments!”

“And hello to you too, dear, “ Mrs. Carter said blandly, coming in from the parlor. “How was school?”

“Stupid. Miss Peters gave us a stupid assignment.”

“Denise, do please try to use a different word. What assignment did you get?”

Denise huffed and went to the fridge, pulling out a bottle of juice and taking a swallow, ignoring the look of consternation on her mom’s face. “We have to interview someone.”

“Hmm. Any restrictions on to whom?”

Denise bit into an apple. “Well, obvious...” she swallowed, “obviously it’s gotta be one of the villagers, don’t it? And it can’t be our parents, that’s cheatin’ or something. Thing is, I want to interview...you know, cool people.”

Mrs. Carter blinked. “And the villagers aren’t cool?”

“Well, y’know, they’re...okay, but I wanna really nail this...WAIT! I got it!” Denise gulped down some more juice, then kissed her mom on the cheek and took off.

Aziraphale was in the midst of executing a very complicated braid on Crowley when the doorbell rang. “Bloody hell...” Fuming a bit, he went to answer, his face immediately changing to a bright smile. “Denise! My dear, whatever brings you here?”

“Uh...wehadanassignmentatschooltodoaninterviewandiwaswonderingificouldtalktoyouandtony”

Aziraphale blinked. “Dear, try saying that and pausing for breath.”

Denise gulped. “Uh. We’re supposed to conduct an interview and I was wondering if you and Tony would...umm..”

Aziraphale’s face lit up. “Of course! Come in, please! Anthony dear, Denise is here.”

‘I see that.’ Crowley grinned at her. ‘What’s up?’

“She wants to interview us! For school!” Aziraphale said, beaming. He resumed braiding Crowley’s hair. “Ask away.”

Denise nodded, then rummaged in her backpack for the set of questions she had been given. “Umm. Well, First question is What is your earliest memory?”

Aziraphale frowned in thought. “Hmmm...well, probably the first time I saw Mother. She’s just so...all encompassing.”

‘Weird’, thought Denise. “Tony?”

‘First time I Sang.’

Denise blinked back tears. “You mean you used to be a singer?” Crowley nodded, and Denise sniffled. “I’m sorry.” She shook herself. “Next question, if you could meet any historical figure, who would it be and why?”

Aziraphale and Crowley looked at each other and burst out laughing. Well, Aziraphale cackled while Crowley grinned, his body shaking. Denise pouted. “What’s so funny?!”

“Oh, my dear, we aren’t laughing at you, but at the absurdity of the question! Crowley and I have met so many historical figures over the centuries that to answer the question would be impossible. Though I do wish I could have spent more time with Oscar. He was a dear friend.”

‘He was a wanker and I don’t like him.’

Aziraphale poked Crowley. “You were ASLEEP, and I was lonely. Besides, you know full well that we were nothing more than friends, Star Maker.”

Denise gaped at them. “Wait. Oscar….Oscar Wilde Oscar?!”

“Well, I certainly don’t mean Oscar the Grouch.” Aziraphale said, grinning. Denise’s jaw was on her chest, and Crowley leaned forward and gently pushed it closed. “My dear, neither Crowley nor I are entirely ignorant of the fact that this whole village has...shall we say, figured out that we are somewhat more than human.”

“So are you fairies? I got this bet with Eric Reed at school, he says you’re both fairies.”

Crowley grinned. ‘Not Fae, no. But I don’t think that’s the definition Eric meant.’

Denise giggled. “Well, I mean you two are obviously queer. Oooh, vampire?” She looks at Crowley, who grins, flashing his fangs.

‘Close, but not quite.’

Aziraphale, who has finished braiding his love’s hair, stands up. “This might help a bit.” With that, he unfurls his wings. Denise yelps. “Well, any guesses?”

“Uhh...bird person?”

Crowley falls onto the floor laughing at the look on Aziraphale’s face. “B...bird person?!”

‘He’s an angel, Denise.’

Denise rolls her eyes. “Well, yeah, I mean he is super nice and all.”

Aziraphale gapes at her. “No, he means it in the literal sense.”

“B...but angels aren’t real!”

Aziraphale looks indignant. “So you’ll believe in Fae, which, incidentally, AREN’T IN THIS REALM, but not angels, even when A REAL LIFE ANGEL IS STANDING IN FRONT OF YOU?!” He’s more shocked than angry.

Denise gulps. “Umm...” Aziraphale huffs and flops onto the couch, muttering under his breath. “I was always told that angels were, y’know, all...glowy and with lots of wings and eyes. The whole ‘Don’t be scared’ bit.”

Aziraphale smirks. “You mean like this?” With that, he manifests a version of his True Form that won’t cause instant blindness and hysteria. It’s still rather impressive, though. Denise shrieks, and Aziraphale changes back, still looking smug. “Satisfied?”

“Yeah...so...what’s Tony?”

‘Demon. And no, I’m not showing you my True Form. But...’ Crowley changes into his snake form. Denise shrieks once more, this time in elation. “THAT IS SO AWESOME.”

Crowley preens, and Aziraphale pretends to look upset. “So, now that we’ve cleared a few things up, would you like to continue the interview?”

“HELL YES.”

Two days later, Denise bursts into their house without knocking, a huge grin on her face. “I NAILED IT!”

“Excellent!” Aziraphale hands over a plate of cookies. “I knew you could.”

Denise bites into the cookie, sighing. “Now, Ezra, I want to know more about Oscar Wilde.”


End file.
